The proverb I quoted yesterday hasn’t really anything to do with what I’m talking about. That proverb is for you who keeps babbling and never let anyone else open their their mouth. But it’s worth a thought nevertheless…

Anyway.

Being a good listener isn’t always about participating in a discussion or having alternate sulutions or ideas to what she is talking about. There is another side to it. (I guess there might be a thousand sides more, but this is one.)

There will be moments when she feels depressed, moments when she is pissed at something at work, moments when she feels indecisive. And as the practical kind of helpful guy I am, I come running with the perfect solution! And waits for her to hug me and say “thanks” a thousand times, waiting for her to kiss me a thousand times.

More often than not, this is not what she wants from you. Sometimes, it’s even going to upset her a bit. What she really wants, is your absolute attention. She may just need to get it out of her system, talk to someone, preferably you, about it. So don’t throw yourself over her with ” a thousand ways to solve your problem”, when it’s not want she wanted in the first place.

Of course you can ask her, if you can help in any way. But you will be surprised to hear her reply,almost every time. “Nah…I just wanted to let you know how I feel - I’ll manage.

Basically - the issue here is that she will be satisfied just by knowing that you understand how she feels, she will be comforted by knowing that she has your complete support - every step of the way.

 To be continued. //Pelle