Today I had  an, umm…., interesting discussion with a fellow market salesman (is that the correct word?Anyway, we sell our stuff outdoor at marketplaces). Well - this man is a darned genious when it comes to history. It seems there is nothing he does not know! He is so well-informed that it scares me. He is very cunning, and most sympathic.  And I do not dislike him as a person, even after what you are about to read. I just think that he, in this case, was wrong.

Well, we ended up discussing the Hiroshima bomb. In his opinion, they had it coming. In fact, they actually deserved it! “Why is that?” I asked. “-Well, you remember Pearl Harbour?” he asked me.    ”-Ehm…no, but I know of it.”(I was born 1960).  He went on: “-Here we have thousands of young american soldiers, sleeping at night in their ships and quarters - they don’t have a clue what is going to strike them. Japan attacked the Pearl Harbour without even having declared war against the USA. They didn’t stand a chance!”

He went on; “- So when USA dropped the bomb on Hiroshima and Nagasaki, it was justice! Those fucking nipponesers asked for it! What did they expect, attacking one of the world’s greattest nations. How did they believe they would not be punished?”

To be honest: first I agreed to his reasoning.

But then I started thinking - feeling!

Killing is never OK. I can’t find any acceptance in my heart to take another person’s life.  “They asked for it….”?  “They had it coming…”????

I’m sorry, but I cannot see what  those little children, the hard working men, mothers and  fathers, people like you and me struggling to make end’s meet, hade done to the USA to deserve to be nuked???

The assault on Pearl Harbour was disgusting and totally outrageous. Japan had in fact not even declared war against USA before tha assault.

But…..

It was not those 3 year-old girls in kindergarten who attacked. It was not they who made the decicion. It was not they who killed all those american soldiers.

Vengeance?  Fuck you,  US.

You are my love.

I guess you know that.

You are the air that i breathe, the water I need to grow strong.                                                                                                                                       You are the window I can see thru, to see the world as it really is.

If you didn’t love me - where would I be?                                                                                                                                                                                 If you wasn’t there to hold my hands, I would loose myself.                                                                                                                                                   I would be lost in this mad world.

You keep my feet on the ground.                                                                                                                                                                                                 You hold my insanity at bay.

Without you,                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    I would be lost in  the dark.

You are all the light I need to guide me,                                                                                                                                                                                    in this confusing world.

Today, while listening to the radio I heard the news about the new Terminal 5 at Heathrow Airport. Thay have spent millions(!) at this new terminal, and what happends? They dont even know how to transport the checked-in luggage to the plane!

“Baggage handling problems also endure, with reports claiming up to 5,000 bags that were dumped in storage during the chaos of T5’s opening day have still not been reunited with their owners. “

Now isn’t this just fantastic? loflstc! (laying on floor laughing scaring the cat)

I lack words to describe how I react to this kind of news. Go on and read the article for yourself:

Chaos continues at Heathrow’s T5 as more flights are cancelled

(Source: Times Online)

Well…. At least those news made me smile, from a kind of schadenfreude….

Take care, hug the next person you meet, and thanks for reading this.

//Pelle

All my life I’ve had a special kind of feeling about the forest. I had always had a wish to live out of town. Near the forest - hell, I want to live in the woods, of possible.

Today, I’m 47 years old. I still want to live near the forest (I have actually done that, from time to time).

Lately, though, my thoughts have been wandering along trails where they never had before. I have, for as long as I can remember, had a strong urge to just walk out into the forest.  ( I always sort of “make up” excuses to go there; “need the ecercise”, “go for a walk with the dog”, “picking mushrooms”, etc etc). I love the atmosphere, the sense of stillness, the compact silence and….

Yes, and what? Something more. Something undefined, something that keeps eluding me, no matter how hard I try to put words to it. But - every time I find myself in the woods - sometimes deep into the vast area of trees - something happens.

I get restless. I breathe in the stillness, that sometimes magic sense of just being there - and then I become restless. What am I doing there? Finally, after no more than 30 minutes I head back home again.

What is new about this, is thatI have lately begun to, kind of, analyze this.

Accept, for a moment, that our souls are eternal. Accept for a moment that our souls wander. I am new to this kind of thinking. I have always been very sceptic about this reincarnation thingy. I still am…but-

What if?

What if it is true?

Throw me and my thinking in the garbage if you like. I will not be insulted. The rest of you - read on.

Is there a reason for this manic love of the woods? What is it, that keeps draggin’ me out there? And why do I get so restless and annoyed whenever I finally get there?

In my embryo of suspicions there can be a reason. Deep inside me, a feeling has been born. Is there  someone waiting for me out there? Could it be that we, me and my loved one, set up to meet at a certain place? And that somehow by some reason that meeting never took place? Did one of us die before we could meet? What happened? Am I a restless longing soul in search of an ancient love?

What if our souls really wander? What if our souls actually remembers?

What if……?

All those little things…

Little things. In an ordinary day in an ordinary life nothing much happens worth dwelling on…

You think so? Well, think of all those little moments. In a fragment of a second something can occur that makes your day. Or ruins it. I think we need to stop for a second, try to halt our rush-hour lives now and then and pay attention to what goes on. There are so many things that can make us happy, laugh out loud, or just smile with amusement for a few seconds. Examples of what I mean could be:

• Watching the birds in spring moving in into the nesting box you just built
• Waking up to notice it’s a clear blue sky outside.
• Looking out the window and see the rain pouring down. (Hell, what do I know? There are ppl that loves that too)
• Finding a 100 dollar bill in that jacket you haven’t used in ages

I could make this list a thousand pages… However - it aint really those “little things” I meant initially. What I find important is what is going on between me and my wife. Here, too, you can find a lot of small moments that actually strengthens your relationship.

One example, I was sitting the other day, my head deeply buried in the computer screen, editing my swedish homepage. When I looked up, I “caught” my wife sitting there watching me. I blinked, and she gave me a little smile, her eyes still focused on mine. Then she blinked back and continued reading.

Another thing between us is that we hardly ever walk by each other, without someone reaches out to touch the other. Nothing sexual (well….mostly not, anyway) only a brief touch while we keep on passin each other. Sometimes one of us grabs hold, and we share a brief but warm hug.

More of this to come. //Pelle

Now, this is weird…..

Sat Mar 22, 11:05 AM

By The Associated Press

CHICAGO - A corn flake shaped like Illinois is now a museum piece.

A trivia-company owner from Austin, Texas, purchased the flake on EBay Friday night from two sisters in Virginia for $1,350.

Monty Kerr owns TriviaMania.com. He plans to put the flake in a traveling museum along with other items of Americana.

Twenty-three-year-old Melissa McIntire says she and her 15-year-old sister, Emily, were biting their nails as the auction ended. She says the family is relieved and can’t believe they sold the cereal for more than $1,000.

The first auction attempt was stopped by EBay due to rules against auctioning food, so the sisters auctioned a coupon good for the flake instead. The new owner says he’ll probably send somebody to Virginia to pick it up personally and make sure it doesn’t get damaged.

The McIntires say they’ll likely use the money to take a vacation.

I found this article at Yahoo news, Canada. Read the original article here: http://ca.news.yahoo.com/s/capress/080322/koddities/oddity_ebay_corn_flake

Words…an underestimated power

I am 47 years old. I met my wife in october 1990. We married in 1992. And still, after all this years, almost 17 years later, I still consider me as a happily married man. And I tell you, it keeps growing better for every year that passes by.

We hardly ever fight (anymore :o) ) , our sexlife….Wow -our sexlife is….ehm…well….none of your business, actually…

The thing is, we work together. We actually spend almost 24 hours a day in each other’s company. And still we don’t rip each other’s heart out. And why is that?

Maybe I’m just fortunate. Maybe I stumbled on the once-in-a-lifetime bulls-eye moment. I sure am. And I sure did.

But - is that all there is to it? I don’t think so. I think I - we- must be doing something right. The unique power of love that we share would never had existed if we had chosen the ‘wrong’ path in our relationship.

In the beginning, this path had so many forks…And, of course, we made a lot of wrong turns in our first years together. But somehow we always got back on track again.

Because we wanted to.

Because we learned that romance is not always about what you want - but also what she wants. It takes  two to tango - right?

Because we eventually learned how to talk to each other.We learned to communicate!

One of the biggest, and most common, I believe, mistakes we make is a HUGE one. Men and women alike, we automatically assume that “she knows what I mean”.

Have you ever heard a woman say; “He should have known that, without me having to spell it out loud!”   For Christ’s sake - we are no mindreaders! Talk to each other! Always let him/her know you feelings. Good feelings as well as the bad ones.

I know you can do this. I know that, because I myself must have been the worst case ever. In the early years of our life together I was really a zombie regarding this subject.   All credits goes to my wife for awakening me. She literally forced me to start talking ’bout my feelings, my needs. She made me talk about what I wanted in our relationship. She made me understand the importance of communications in our relationship.

Regardless of what you believe, there is no way he/she can know your feelings or your needs without you telling her/him. “She should have known….”  “She should have guessed I didn’t want her to do that….” Ridiculous statements, if you ask me!

How ever - unfortunately it’s not enough to start talking to each other. There is another huge obstacle….

Know this: We men do not speak the same language as women do. I’m sorry, but it is a fact. It is not a subject John Gray wrote several books about just for the fun of it. This is crucial for the survival of your relationship.

Even if you guys actually manage to start to really talk to each other, there is no telling if your partner knows what you are saying. Sometimes we almost need an interpretor sitting between us. I can’t count the times we have actually have had the same opinion, but ended up arguing just because we didn’t speak the same language.

I won’t go any deeper into this (remember, John Gray has filled several books on this) right now. But be sure that you are aware of this. Make sure that  your love really understands what you mean.

This Mars and Venus thing is nothing but True. Believe me

The proverb I quoted yesterday hasn’t really anything to do with what I’m talking about. That proverb is for you who keeps babbling and never let anyone else open their their mouth. But it’s worth a thought nevertheless…

Anyway.

Being a good listener isn’t always about participating in a discussion or having alternate sulutions or ideas to what she is talking about. There is another side to it. (I guess there might be a thousand sides more, but this is one.)

There will be moments when she feels depressed, moments when she is pissed at something at work, moments when she feels indecisive. And as the practical kind of helpful guy I am, I come running with the perfect solution! And waits for her to hug me and say “thanks” a thousand times, waiting for her to kiss me a thousand times.

More often than not, this is not what she wants from you. Sometimes, it’s even going to upset her a bit. What she really wants, is your absolute attention. She may just need to get it out of her system, talk to someone, preferably you, about it. So don’t throw yourself over her with ” a thousand ways to solve your problem”, when it’s not want she wanted in the first place.

Of course you can ask her, if you can help in any way. But you will be surprised to hear her reply,almost every time. “Nah…I just wanted to let you know how I feel - I’ll manage.

Basically - the issue here is that she will be satisfied just by knowing that you understand how she feels, she will be comforted by knowing that she has your complete support - every step of the way.

 To be continued. //Pelle

Listen - or thy tongue will keep thee deaf. - Native American Proverb

Imagine this: The two of you is having a late supper. You have finished eating, and you are sipping your second cup of coffee, tea or - what the hell, if you like - your 2nd glass of whiskey. You have both told each other about the day that passed - you in like 25 words, and your love in… um….500? In front of you lies the crosswords, sudoku or the evening paper and you are, at least a little, concentrating in reading/solving. -Honey? she says. Know what? You peak at her with one eye and nods. I saw this ad today. A trip to greece, hotel, all inclusive, pool at the roof. The beach is on your doorstep and there is live performances every night at the bar.And you know, I would soo love to get out of here for a weeek or two, the work is getting on my nerves, Susan is a fucking bitch I cant stand even seeing her, and Nick! Please dont get me started on Nick.And every day I have to pick up the garbage in the kitchen, no one else does, and I am so damn tired of beeing the only one who can master the Excel macros we work with. Every damned idiot comes to me for help. What are they, freaking retards? Anyways, I can see you and me there, at the beach, with a Pina Colada each in our hands, just feeling great. At maybe in the late night, even making love at the beach while the waves keep rolling in over us.Wouldnt that be just fantastic?And now is the the time that you make that lethal mistake.-Sure, you say.And you turn your attention to your sudoku again.

If you by now ain’t already dead, she sure as hell have the right to make you feel so.

What I’m really saying is, that you must show her, the love of your life, some respect. I dont care if you had a shitty day. I dont care if you are dead tired. And I certainly dont care if you are “not in the mood”.

If you cant show that gordious woman the respect of really listen to her, then I wuddnt give your relationship the chance to live even for a year.

Know what I mean? Respect! What she really would have wanted you to to is saying something like:

-Man that would be so nice! Or:

-I love that idea, but I would rather take a trip to Spain. And take this holiday discussion to the next level.

Get the idea? It is not really so much what you reply, it’s more that you’re showing some interest in what she is talking about. And show that you are eager to discuss this.

And is this no place for pretending. Dont even think of pretending to be interested in what she has to say. You need to be genuinly interested. Otherways, you and her hasn’t much to give each other.

If you truly - I mean truly - love that girl, then it won’t be a need for “pretending”. If she is the girls of your dreams, you princess, then all this comes naturally.

More about this tomorrow….

Define love. I mean, what is love, really? And what isn’t? It’s not that easy to answer that question, huh?

But say this: Love is all about doing whatever it takes (or in some cases not doing certain things) to keep your girlfriend/spouse/wife/mistress happy. Right?

No?

No! That is definitely one thing that love is not. Denying yourself is absolutely taking the wrong road. You will eventually come to a point in your life, when you cant stand another day in her company. Probably, she will grow tired of you, as well. There is no identity to find in a man who follows his’ girl’s every single wish ( Which by now has become commands) He becomes transparent, a second little-finger on his wife’s left hand.

So - the 1’st of my 10 advices to you must be:

WALK YOUR OWN PATH! Follow your heart in every aspect and moment of your life. You need to be true to yourself. Make every word you say your own.

Now…Every decision you make, may not be the “right” one. So be it. But they will be your decisions. And the woman of your heart may not approve on every single decision you make. Face it - she might even be angry with you. So what? That’s not the end of the world. In the end, it’s all for the better. In her eyes, you will no more be a nobody. In her eyes you will have a soul of your own, you are a person that is you.

How could she love you, if she doesn’t know who you are? And how the hell is she supposed to desire your love if she sees right through you?

The answer is: She cannot. And she won’t.

(To be continued….)

Authors note: As far as I know, there is no government stating these 10 steps as rules. They are not to be looked upon as facts. These are my own personal thoughts and experiences from 17 years of marriage. (Yes - I managed to keep this great feline for all these years). I have discovered that it works for my wife - but more important, they work for me.

Yadayada…What I’m trying to say. Follow the advices at your own risk. Don’t come killing me if she turns mad, and breaks up with you.